Raptorific
I go to Temple and enjoy soda. I also like dinosaurs and Batman. I promise, I am not a child.
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Photoset reblogged from Raptorific
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There’s a dude in the dining hall debating whether or not he should start watching Internet porn. Another dude warned him against it because he could get viruses, and encouraged him to buy magazines.
My two immediate thoughts:
- How does a dude who is comfortable enough to openly discuss porn where anyone can hear and blog about it get to college without discovering internet porn?!
- Is this his version of the “paper book vs. e-reader” debate?
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When I’m in the privacy of my own home, scrolling because I’m bored:
- Memes
- Jokes I’ve heard before
- Sports
- Photosets of TV Shows I have not seen
- Unpopular opinions that are actually popular opinions
When I’m in a class where people are behind me and can see what I’m looking at:
- Sex gifs
- Assorted erect penises that I wouldn’t really want to see whilst by myself, let alone with a classroom full of people behind me.
- Cats (because who isn’t impressed by a dude who spends his whole class period looking at cats?)
- FHM pictures of Naya Rivera that I am incredibly interested in but can’t linger on because there are people behind me who will think me creepy for looking at sexy pictures in class.
- Calls for social justice complete with pictures of people who have recently been savagely beaten that I want to read, but would rather not have people look over my shoulder and think I’m just looking at pictures of wounded people.
- In-depth, interesting theories on science, politics, literature, and my favorite television shows that I can’t look at because I’m in class and can’t read one analysis while listening to the professor’s, and, my apologies to tumblr, but I’m kind of paying a lot to listen to this guy’s lectures and can get yours for free at my local library.
- Reblog notifications that lead to a blog with autoplay music.
- If someone sitting behind me would judge me for looking at it, you can be certain someone will post it at the EXACT MOMENT that person looks over my shoulder.
- tumblr
- Naya Rivera
- cats
- sex
- Social Justice
- Music
- temple
- temple university
- college
- Memes
- unpopular opinion
- porn
- Seriously guys get off the ''sex'' and ''porn'' tags if that's where you're reading this. Half the posts have to be shit like this and you're going to get better results on google images without anyone tagging things that just MENTION sex or porn
- Penis
- Erection
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I get it. Jesus is great and I’m going to hell. Now, if you don’t mind, you’re making it hard to hear “Sympathy for the Devil” on my iPod, and I have to finish this blog post about Harry Potter so I can get home. I have a lot of porn to watch.
Love,
Dan
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The movie was about internet pornography and the dangers it posed to the young people, only it’s a lifetime movie, so they couldn’t show or even imply the kind of thing you’d do whilst viewing pornography, just the porn-viewing. They used “drinking energy drinks” as a surrogate, so every time you’d expect him to start doing stuff, he breaks out a Red Bull and starts drinking it. At one point, his mom walks in on him and he’s sitting perfectly still at his computer desk with one hand on the mouse and the other on the desk. He’s really only looking at the pictures. He might strain his eyes on the computer screen, but there are really no other physical concerns here.
Of course, his porn addiction (which he develops after approximately two viewings) causes his grades to suffer (somehow) and he becomes a weaker swimmer (somehow) which ruins his Swim Team performance. He then goes after a girl who appears in pornographic images and loses his girlfriend, and his attraction to this girl gets him beat up. It’s the one portrayal of this kind of situation where one person says “It’s perfectly natural for a boy his age” (in this case, 16) and the movie is like “LOL Nope, look at all these terrible things that WILL happen to YOUR SON if he ever looks at a naked lady on the internet.”
Anyway, the point of this post is that the movie is called “Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life,” but my sister invariably remembers the name as being “Cyberjackers,” which I maintain is a better name for the film.
- Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life
- Cyber Seduction
- Lifetime
- Lifetime Original Movie
- Honestly though how was that mother surprised to find out her 16-year-old son was looking at porn?
- Actually the bigger question might be how the kid got to 16 without discovering porn himself
- That is where my suspension of disbelief ends.
- I mean you can get to 16 without partaking in pornography but this kid didn't even realize it was a thing until he was 16
- I just don't understand how you can live 16 years and never think to yourself ''Maybe some people take their pictures without clothes on.''
- porn
- pornography
- I'm really sorry to anyone tracking the ''porn'' tag who is forced to read my anecdote about watching a Lifetime movie with my sister
- Except I'm not really all that sorry because if you're reading the ''porn'' tag you should probably take a little break anyway
- Seriously
- Get something to drink or maybe a snack then read my movie review and then go back to whatever you were doing.
- You know
- Drinking energy drinks.
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Not the totally batshit random stuff, that I’ve come to accept.
But I just discovered this: I typed in “Mila Kunis,” and it autocompleted to “Mila Kunis Forgetting Sarah Marshall.” When I deleted the L at the end, it brought up a whole new list, which included “Mila Kunis Forgetting Sarah Marshall photo.”
And I’m like “hypothetical dude searching google a while ago, you and I both know that you were looking for the naked picture of her. We all know that. There was no other photo of her in that movie. Google is NOT GOING TO JUDGE YOU. Just type in what you’re looking for, and as long as you remember to delete your history, no one will EVER KNOW you looked for it. The fact that your search did not explicitly say you were looking for a naked picture of Mila Kunis does not mean you came across it accidentally.”
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