Raptorific
I go to Temple and enjoy soda. I also like dinosaurs and Batman. I promise, I am not a child.
-
A new best in the field of trashfinding. I have found an official mascot for my blog.
My question to you, my good followers, is what should I name him?
-
Do you consider raptors to be terrific?
Asked by jerseyknitsheets
It’s illogical to have opinions on things that have objective, empirical answers.
-
Dan, why is the title of your blog Raptorific? Just curious because I have a small obsession with Jurassic Park. ( both the books and movies) That title was the reason I followed you but as I look further into your site I like what you have to say. Keep posting! -engaginge
Asked by engaginge
The general reason the blog is called “raptorific” is because I’ve love dinosaurs, especially Raptors, because I loved Jurassic Park growing up (and still do!) but I usually sum it up thusly:
-
- TJ: what kind of bird brings babies?
- Me: Velociraptor
- TJ: close.what kind of bird doesnt bring babies?
- Me: Sonny the Cocoa Puffs Cuckoo Bird
- TJ: no a swallow get it hhahaha
- Me: Toucan Sam
- TJ: you really know how to ruin a joke
- Me: Iago from Aladdin
-
I drew these while discussing Genesis and the serpent Archetype.
-
I’ve extracted all my facebook statuses since 2009 (there’s an app) and am reading through them now. A lot of them come from before I had tumblr, but they’re stuff I would have put on tumblr if I did have it. I’m presenting these mostly without context:
- You can only shout “WHERE ARE THE VELOCIRAPTORS” at the employees so many times before they kick you out of the zoo.
- It doesn’t really matter what it is you’re drinking, it will taste better if the glass you’re drinking from has Spock on it.
- There’s a certain point where no one’s allowed to direct Leonard Nimoy as Spock anymore. Leonard Nimoy knows best what Spock would do. If he thinks Spock should spend the whole scene sampling fancy cheeses, you can’t really argue with him, can you?
- Yes, in fact, it IS possible to get razor burn with an electric razor.
- It’s weird to hear Mos Def Rapping when I only know him as Ford Prefect
- “What if Bigfoot busts in here?!” “If you knew me you’d know I don’t joke about Bigfoot.” -Conversation between me and Mr. Kelly.
- “Because, Chris, I don’t have time to just dick around the library all day!”
- Today in study hall I had a dream that I was reading Dune… And in said dream, Paul shouts “I’m Cuckoo for Concubines!” What the hell is going on in my brain?!
- “The Spice must flow!” “That doesn’t mean you can sneak up on people and throw cinnamon in their eyes, PAUL.”
- Oh, Fresh Prince. You told your girlfriend you were going to a Basketball game but instead you went to a Party, and then she shows up to THE SAME PARTY!! What will happen on this show next?
- Fresh Prince floods his girlfriend’s house, and he automatically jumps back into her good graces. Luckily, his uncle got them relationship counseling and she ended up mad at him. As it should have been. Because he FLOODED HER HOUSE.
- The commercial for a product to stop people grinding their teeth makes me grind my teeth. It’s like a commercial for overactive bladder medicine showing waterfalls and hurricanes, or a commercial for depression medicine showing a wet kitten.
- “I am in Russian Pickle.”
- “Well, we’d create neighborhoods for the aliens to live in where they could speak their own language and retain their culture and Oh my god, I’m suggesting Alien Ghettos, aren’t I?!” -Quotes from debate club
- I think I may be haunted.
- Dear Suzanne Collins: Please stop writing Peeta and Katniss into bad situations. I’m not sure my little old heart can take it. Love, Dan
- If a future version of you came back in time and you had to hang around with them, who would you tell people they are so the people don’t all think you’re crazy?
- “District 9” is the opposite of “The Metamorphosis.” The guy’s turning into a bug, only instead of being a burden on everyone he loves, everyone wants to get their hands on him. Your move, Kafka.
- BAD NEWS BEARS! THE PERFECT STORM didn’t miss us. We told old man winter “BRING IT ON,” and he made sure to PAY IT FORWARD. But I’m sure it will all be cleared up by THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW. I’ve got a SIXTH SENSE about these things. Although, as snow storms go, this is AS GOOD AS IT GETS. Luckily A FEW GOOD MEN came to plow and salt the MEAN STREETS. Alright, I’ve got to go, GOODNIGHT AND GOOD LUCK.
- “Have fun with the character. Just because you’re a mindless drone doesn’t mean you weren’t alive once. Try to come up with a backstory. Why is your zombie wearing a sombrero? Who knows? (you do.)”
- Discussion: What would you do if you came into possession of a “Handsome Ray?”
- What’s the most surprising sensation you can think of? I can top that: Hot chicken pot pie to the foot.
- “Spiders drink your eyeball water.” -Jessica
- Is Kelsey Grammer British or just Fancy?
- I have a green lantern power ring. I’ve been wearing it for 7 HOURS and I still can’t make a dune buggy with my brain. I think all it needs is some sprite.
- I wonder if a Secondary History Education Degree is enough to land me a career in the field of mythbusting.
- When someone someday writes a biography of me, I want them to include the quote “I used to think honey came from bears” and attribute it to Andrew, regardless of whether or not he actually said it.
- Season Finale of V tonight. I’m currently watching Glee. Why can’t they be the same show? I would SO WATCH a musical TV show about singing and dancing secret evil lizards.
- I don’t know how to feel about this: Tonight is my last chance to not watch a new episode of Lost. What can I not watch now that it’s over?!
- How many experience points is Graduation worth? I want to level up.
- Can a movie still say “No animals were harmed in the making of this production” if, for the movie, they kill a bug?
- I’m afraid of John Lithgow, and goddamnit, I’m not afraid to admit it!
- “Dan’s sense of humor when it comes to his athletic abilities will be missed next year.” Best report card comment EVER.
- Today I saw a minivan, completely engulfed in flames, and a man who looked shockingly like Zachary Quinto. Guess which one I was more amazed by.
- Dracula is to vampires as Superman is to humans. “What does that make Edward Cullen?” you may ask. The answer is a resounding “Jimmy Olsen.”
- The guy from the Dead Kennedys sounds like Brak.
- The money that William Shatner’s “Priceline Negotiator” saved that guy by keeping him from taking the evil twin’s sale price was wasted when that guy had to spend three times as much to repair the Shatner-shaped hole that was just burned into his wall.
- “Hi, I’m Zachary Quinto and I’m here to solve your problems.”
- Random encounter yesterday: A man at a table with a Che Guevara banner and lots of socialist literature is handing out newspapers. I say to him, “What are you protesting?” He replies “Capitalism, man!” So I try to take one of the newspapers, and he says “Wait, let me get a buck for that.”
- This weekend trip home has achieved rigamarole status.
- The fresh prince theme song is a lot funnier when you assume the “Homes” he talks to is Sherlock Holmes.
- “Give me one of those 89 cent burritos.” “They 99 cents now.” “…Okay, give me one of those 99 cent burritos.”
- Lil’ Wayne was released from prison today. In other unimportant news, the walls in this room are beige.
- Screw you, Microsoft Word! I KNOW how to spell “Tutankhamun,” and it DOESN’T HAVE AN “E” IN IT.
- Meatball sandwiches trick you by being delicious, then get sauce on your sweater and burn your hand.
- On the advice of the lunatic screaming at me on the bus, I have decided to change my major to “Cracker History.”
- Just accidentally kicked luminary sand into an old man’s face. Merry Christmas, everyone!
- I was trying to remember a Douglas Adams joke, so I asked Chacha to help me figure out what it was. I got the response “I tend not to read or watch Science Fiction, particularly comedy fiction. The point is that if it’s less good than what I do, there’s no point in reading it, if it’s better than what I do it makes me depressed.”
- So, apparently today is Batman’s birthday. I don’t know what to get him, because all I want for my birthday every year is “to be Batman,” and I’m pretty sure he already has that.
- Most random thing I’ve woken up to at college: My RA knocking on my door to inform me that they’ve found my pants with my ID in them and they’re at the front desk. I wasn’t aware I’d lost them.
- Just found out in class that British Abolitionist (and native Nigerian) Olaudah Equiano, when he first saw white men, thought they were the walking dead. In all fairness, given what happened next, he was kind of right to be suspicious.
- Hulu is now telling me that my ads are “personalized” by their special ad tailoring program. What are they trying to tell me by showing me nothing but Red Lobster commercials?
- Hulu is showing me a commercial for “Heifer International,” and the guy mentions how an animal means income for a family, through wool, milk, and eggs. What kind of animal has wool, milk, AND eggs?
- So, Scar, do you REALLY think the best time to announce your new Lion/Hyena alliance is in the middle of your brother’s funeral?
- Someday I will need, more than anything, a burning hot bowl filled with lukewarm liquid. On that day, my microwave will be there for me.
- “THIS IS OUR FINAL MOSES.” -Peter Albrecht as the Dalek Emperor.
- For “Snakes on a Plane,” Samuel L. Jackson’s contract specified that no snakes were to come within 25 feet of Mr. Jackson. Experts believe this was included for the safety of the snakes.
- ABC Family, you don’t seem to understand. People don’t just feel an overwhelming urge to watch your channel at 5:00. They go there for the GILMORE GIRLS. Putting your own terrible original programming in that time slot is not going to trick people into watching “The Nine Lives of Chloe King.”
- Just watched X-Men: First Class. Is it just me, or is Jen Lawrence’s Mystique the queen of overcompensation? She jumps from “Don’t hide your beautiful true form” to “Walk around naked” in like half a second.
- I have class at 2, which I guess means I have to put pants on at some point soon.
- Just saw that the original “Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers” is now on Netflix streaming. I don’t think I’d enjoy it as much now, but if I were to tell my 7-year-old self, he’d probably say “what’s Netflix?”
- velociraptor
- velociraptors
- Spock
- Star Trek
- Leonard Nimoy
- Mos Def
- Ford Prefect
- Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
- Bigfoot
- Dune
- Fresh Prince
- Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
- district 9
- The Hunger Games
- The Metamorphosis
- Franz Kafka
- Kafka
- Zombies
- Sombrero
- Spiders
- Kelsey Grammer
- Green Lantern
- Mythbusters
- V
- glee
- Lost
- Lohn Lithgow
- zachary quinto
- Dracula
- superman
-
Photo reblogged from Fuck Yeah, Dinosaur Art!
Gigantoraptor by Rob Kiely of Caveboy Studios
Notice how the smaller, superior velociraptors are taking it down.
